Empathy

Just a few minutes ago, a student came to look for me to tell me that she wants to back out from the camp. The reason she gave was that her family is having some problems and that she needs to be there for her mother. Her brothers are hardly at home and her mother is highly stressed, she said. She didn't elaborate on what the problem is, and I wasn't inclined to ask. I'm really not one to probe into people's personal problems. (that's probably why I'd suck as a counsellor...coz I never know what questions to ask)

She looked like she was in a difficult position. She said she really wanted to go for the camp, which I believed she did, because if not, she wouldnt buy a $45 backpack just for the trek. As she was trying to tell me her reasons, she looked like she was gonna cry.

I do not deny that there's a part of me that wonders if she's just a very good actress. Perhaps the cynicism etched in me is just too strong. Sometimes when the students give reasons such as the passing of a grandparent as an excuse not to come for camps, my boss would doubt them. And it kinda make me feel like as if i'm too naive and gullible to believe them. But I do think its a bit too much to request a death certificate to prove that the reason they gave is valid and true.

Anyway, when the student told me the reason why she has to back out from the camp, I immediately pictured myself in her shoes. When she told me "I think my mother is very stressed", i thought about my own mother's irrational outbursts. Maybe that was why i didn't question her further. I felt like I could understand what she meant when she said she has to be around for her mother, and that she's not at ease about leaving her mother alone.

I patted her on her arm and told her to "take care".

Sometimes I believe that these students are much stronger than I am.